Texas Makes The TPM Front Page

... and not for any good reasons, you may be sure:

• ‘Texas Burger Chain Bans Open Carry, People Freak Out’



Does this appeal to you?

There is a Whataburger across the street from my beloved Star Pizza, and the Whataburger muthaf^<kers are forever arranging to tow cars from their lot, believing that their occupants are Star customers. There are signs all over the front door and lobby of Star warning people not to park there, but people in a hurry for great pizza don't always read very carefully. Besides, AFAIK, the Whataburger muthaf^<kers do not serve veggie burgers; Burger King and the few remaining indy burger joints do.

• ‘GOP Texas Judge Will Only Marry Gay Couples If They Sign Form Saying He’d Rather Not’



Judge
DePiazza

I look forward to the first LGBTQ pair who refuse to sign, then sue the judge for violating a Supreme Court order. Aside to the TPM hed editor: it's "... marry gay couples only if..." not "... only marry gay couples if...," the ghost of my mother advises you.

• ‘The Military Exercise That Drove Texas Insane Is Finally Here’

Not true! Texas was insane centuries before those exercises...

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"God bless you Texas, and keep you brave and strong..." Yes, that's from the official Texas state song, "Texas, Our Texas." And I'll bet you thought it was "The Eyes of Texas," which it's not, unless they've changed it since my childhood.

This has been a PSA (Pretty Stupid Announcement)...