But now, thank god, this whole thing is over and our troops can come home and we won't have to take off our shoes at the airport anymore and can turn our attention to hunting down the next-biggest threat to democracy: Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia. - Will Durst, "Obama gets Osama"


(Earlier banner quotes)

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Florida Passes Law Which May Ban All Sex

It has to do with the fact that humans are animals, and the law bans sex with "dumb animals." Details are at Bryan's place, but I'll tell you the story in man-on-doggerel:

 Getting their Goat

So now the moment has arrived Floridians all dread:
The threat of bestiality has reared its Mossy Head!
They think they're safe when people chafe at human-livestock sex,
But soon they'll find it isn't only Oedipus it wrecks!

The men may not be COWards and perhaps they don't do CHICKEN;
The women aren't full of BULL; with human males they're stickin'.
But gals or blades must note, their clades appear in ANIMALIA...
It's laws on bestiality with which they'll try to jail ya!

And thus with "animals" the Legislature is researchin':
Have all the KIDS gone wild? or is each goat a bestial virgin?
Now on each "date" they tabulate what everybody did...
It ain't just Chucky Cheese's WHERE A KID CAN DO A KID!

- SB the YDS

3 comments:

jams o donnell said...

Excellent Steve! Mercifully Floridians can still violate the natural flora with impunity!*******

Steve Bates said...

Jams, there really is a pizza place called Chuck E. Cheese's, designed specifically as a place for parents of young children to host their birthday parties. Their real slogan is, "Where a kid can be a kid." I have no friends with young children, so I've never been in one, but I'm told it gets pretty loud.

I gather this law must have come about (though I'm uncertain) because Florida encountered an instance of bestiality and found... horrors!... that there was no law against it. Made me LMFAO!

Considering some of the carnivorous flora out there, you might want to be careful which plants you violate. :-)

fallenmonk said...

I'm really just testing blogger but I might comment that not having Floridians have sex and subsequently reproduce might be a good thing for a generation of two. Just saying.

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